Awkward Voicemail

Category: Russian Code Names This one speaks for...

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 19:09:00 -0400

Category: Russian Code Names

This one speaks for itself.

Excerpt: “I’m completely single. I’m very intelligent. I’m great in bed.”

Category: SportsCenter Anchor Doing His Best Swingers...

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 19:49:00 -0500

Category: SportsCenter Anchor Doing His Best Swingers Impression

ESPN anchor Scott Van Pelt (blue shirt) left this message for a lovely lady he met (and hit on) at bar called Bottle & Cork in Dewey Beach, Delaware.

Excerpt: “Enjoyed meeting you…I knew as soon as you left I’d never see you again…”

Category: Cabin Fever After a big snow storm, a 17 year-old...

Thu, 07 Feb 2008 23:13:00 -0500

Category: Cabin Fever

After a big snow storm, a 17 year-old high school student called the chief operating officer of his school system in Virginia to ask why he hadn’t declared a snow day. The student included his name and phone number and later got this message from the COO’s wife.

Category: Celebrity Candidate Endorsement In honor of Super...

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 20:55:00 -0500

Category: Celebrity Candidate Endorsement

In honor of Super Tuesday, we present to you an Oscar-winning faux voicemail.

(No word on whether this particular celebrity is endorsing this particular candidate so he can hang out at rallies with fellow celebrity endorsers Amber Tamblyn and America Fererra.)

Category: Reaction to Perceived Slight Scene: A woman goes to a...

Mon, 04 Feb 2008 21:05:00 -0500

Category: Reaction to Perceived Slight

Scene: A woman goes to a bar to scout a band she is considering hiring to play at her son’s graduation party.

Andrea Allen describes what happened:

My boyfriend, Carl (a member of the band), “pretended like he didn’t know” this woman when he told her to hang on for one minute while he got me a drink at the bar. She left this voicemail and continued to scream about how much Carl’s band sucked the rest of the night before getting kicked out. Apparently she kept mouthing off about the band in the parking lot, so some other drunk people (fans) threatened to beat her to death.

Studies have shown most awkward voicemail happens on the weekend, so be on the lookout for any...

Fri, 07 Dec 2007 14:36:00 -0500

Studies have shown most awkward voicemail happens on the weekend, so be on the lookout for any Awkward Voicemail-worthy messages that might show up in your inbox in the next few days and send them our way.

a w k w a r d v o i c e m a i l [ a t ] g m a i l . c o m

Category: Late Night in New York City Today’s awkward...

Fri, 07 Dec 2007 02:30:00 -0500

Category: Late Night in New York City

Today’s awkward voicemail is brought to you by BetaMale.com

Category: Missed Connection - 5’8, Blonde, Kinda...

Thu, 06 Dec 2007 02:27:00 -0500

Category: Missed Connection - 5’8, Blonde, Kinda Slutty

We’re going to go out on a limb and guess she wasn’t as successful as Patrick Moberg in reconnecting.

"hahah this is awesome! if i find any good messages ill send them your way."

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 20:46:00 -0500

“hahah this is awesome! if i find any good messages ill send them your way.”

-
Jen Dunlap

comments on today's voicemail (below)

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 20:43:00 -0500

farfaraway: It’s been a pretty rough day, but this made it so much better.
andreallen: I started unintentionally imitating the guy’s laugh.
joshmerrill: If this is real, it’s got to be the greatest voicemail ever!
laura!: I find this incredibly funny because it sounds like something one of the guys I worked with over the summer would do. Ange also almost fell off of her chair while I was listening to this.

Category: Car Accident Play by Play Summary: an employee leaving...

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 02:23:00 -0500

Category: Car Accident Play by Play

Summary: an employee leaving a message for his boss that he’s running late witnesses a car accident and its aftermath, which he describes in his voicemail.

"This is like the best thing ever! Reminds me of the time I got drunk and voicemailed my -then- boy..."

Wed, 05 Dec 2007 02:15:00 -0500

“This is like the best thing ever! Reminds me of the time I got drunk and voicemailed my -then- boy telling him that we should break up so that he could be happy. It makes me embarrassed but whoa! so funny!”

-
Jenns, on Awkward Voicemail

Category: Late Night Drunk Dial More proof that alcohol and...

Tue, 04 Dec 2007 17:12:00 -0500

Category: Late Night Drunk Dial

More proof that alcohol and unrequited love is the perfect combination for an awkward voicemail.

(Note the caller’s friends laughing at him in the background. So cruel.)

Category: Celebrity Voicemail If there ever is a Voicemail Hall...

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 20:54:00 -0500

Category: Celebrity Voicemail

If there ever is a Voicemail Hall of Fame, this inspiring message Alec Baldwin left for his little girl must be included. It’s been several months since this hit the interweb, so we invite you to listen again - for the first time!

via TMZ

Category: Consumer Complaint Voicemail Description: Enraged by...

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 18:09:00 -0500

Category: Consumer Complaint Voicemail

Description: Enraged by Jimmy Dean reducing the size of their sausage from 16 oz to 12 oz but still charging the same price, Randy Taylor left a voicemail complaint on Jimmy Dean corporate line.

Many thanks to Jen Dunlap for pointing this out to us.

[originally from Consumerist]

Category: How Not to Attract a Girl in a Voicemail — from...

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 18:02:00 -0500

Category: How Not to Attract a Girl in a Voicemail

— from hrrrthrrr:

my friend’s little sister recieved this voicemail sometime last year and i just came across it again yesterday. thought it was worth a share.